Lauren Bailey: Blog

     I loved reading Beard's The Fourth State of Matter. It was not until I got to the end of the work that I 

was overwhelmed with the feeling of being understood. Beard openly and vulnerably expressed emotions

that I had been holding back or suppressing for a long time. Though her examples were different, the 

theme of feeling out of control and all alone rang true. I like to be in control and when I am not, it rattles 

me. I need to have a plan and if something is outside of my perfect plan, I tend to shut down and not 

function. But here is the thing, you, me, and the rest of humanity has little control on really anything. 

Truly. What I have been forced to learn a lot recently, is the art of surrender. I have learned that there is

a beauty in letting go of the things you cannot control. There is a certain peace that comes when you

finally recognize that you don't have to have everything figured out perfectly all of the time, and for 

someone who is a perfectionist like myself, this is both relieving and scary. However, if the past 6 months

have taught me anything, it is that God is sovereign, He is in control, and He is good. Who am I to 

question when things happen to "go wrong"? Who am I to freak out when life doesn't go as a pictured

in my head? By learning to let go of the reigns of control and hand them over to the One that really does

have control, we have the opportunity to live a fuller, happier, more joy-filled life, while recognizing the 

grace that we have been given by not being in charge of the world.